Hospital Life

I have not slept well in two days…

I have not eaten well in two days…

I have not had a break in two days…

And not one of those is from lack of trying, I assure you.  I have help coming this weekend, but right now that seems forever away.  Hospital life gets really old really quick, especially with a little two year old to entertain and attempt to feed and put to bed.  He’s not eating or sleeping or playing well either!  Although, he has been an almost perfect kid this whole time, I’m so proud.  The nurses keep telling me how well he listens and how good he is and I’m thinking “I know!  I wonder where my real son went to…”  Haha…. sigh…  And I dearly, dearly miss my husband and my other babies at home.  I’ve never been away from Evangeline so long.  And although I know they’re doing alright there, it’s so so hard to be away.

So we are here until Tuesday at least.  I have a huge new found respect for any mother or father who has ever had their child hospitalized.  It’s tough.  Knowing how I feel now, with a child who is going home soon and is on her way to great health, I could not imagine doing this under more painful circumstances.  My heart and prayers go out to the mamas who live this hospital life with children who are in constant pain, or who may not come home, or who need to be hospitalized for weeks or months of their lives, or whose children needed hospitalization urgently without any time for mental preparation or planning, or who have major procedures to walk through with their little ones, or who don’t have the blessing of such an amazing hospital staff.  I could not imagine the hardship that they endure.

Remember all these parents in your prayers tonight.  They all need it so much more than I do.  As for our sweet girl, she is doing better today.  She seems less scared and didn’t scream *every time* I picked her up.  Usually she smiles and laughs when you hold her, here it’s just mostly screaming.  I don’t think she’s in pain anywhere, just scared.  But it’s getting better.  She is obviously hungry.  Poor thing is so upset when her meals are over.  I am thrilled that we can finally up her calories tomorrow for the first time.  Will let you know how it goes!  May God grant us all a peaceful sleep tonight.

Comments

  1. Shelley Stout says:

    It is all to familiar being in the hospital with Logan when he was 6 months old. Not being able to hold him or comfort him, seeing him with all those tubes and wires, sleeping in the fold out recliner or small bench…. And yet we were there for 6 days… So many were there before we were and still there after. My heart and prayers go out to you and all those mommies and daddies in those difficult situations. Thinking of you this evening.

  2. Being in a hospital with your child or children is hard. It’s hard being the Momma Bear when people try to push you around, it’s hard when their IS no break for six weeks straight, and it’s SO much more of a blessing to come home again. I will never forget the parade of little ones outsides my son(s) (two boys , different rooms)doors. Those little bald, tutu wearing cowboy boot shod, littles from oncology…Just SO hard. You hang in there momma, you’ll be fine. As for how filled with love Hope is, we’ve been praying for years, this family since at least 2011. God listens.

  3. My longest stint was about 3 weeks with Daniel though I’ve had a few other experiences. I don’t know if you can go down to the cafeteria and eat or if they can do cuisine-on-call for you but just do your best to keep consistent meal times. I don’t envy you having to do this with your two year old there but it sounds like he understands what he needs to do so that Hope can get better. If you need someone to talk to, ask for a chaplain or the unit’s social worker. There were times when I just needed to vent to someone about how I was feeling and they’re totally used to that.

  4. Tasha Schriewer says:

    I lived in the NICU for almost 4 weeks with Avery, so completely understand. I would be happy to come up and sit with the kiddos and give you a break or take Stephen off your hands for a little while….Gavin & Avery would love playing with him. Also, happy to run to the store and drop off anything you need. I’m serious, please do not hesitate to call my cell 314.780.0443.

    Sending hugs and prayers!!

    ~Tasha

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